Defending Against The Words Of A Cyber Bully: Are We Looking At The Problem Wrong?

Cyber Bullying in recent years has become a pandemic that has every parent and media outlet raging with concern. Parents implement limitations in an attempt to shield their children from the monster on the other side of the keyboard, the government creates legislation in order to hush parents' worries that there will be no justice served to the offender, and community leaders warn children about the dangers that lurk on the internet and inform children how to avoid Cyber Bullying, but is this the wrong way to look at it all?

In today's society we are constantly defending against the result rather than the action. For example: our society tells women not to wear provocative clothing, or to go out alone, or to act too friendly because if they do they might get sexually assaulted. Our society tells blacks not to act suspicious or hang around at night because they will be more likely to have bad encounters with the police if they do. Our society tells teens not to lurk around on online chat rooms because if they do the will be subject to sexual predators. Our society doesn't tell men it is wrong to sexually assault women just because they "were asking for it. Our society doesn't tell police it is wrong and they are breaking the law to stereotype blacks as dangerous. Our society doesn't tell adults that it is wrong to take advantage of children online. The same pattern follows when it come to Cyber Bullying. It is so much easier to tell the teens to "Just delete your account" or "Just unfriend them". It is so much easier to ask the question "Why didn't the parents take the computer away?" or "Why did they keep reading the posts if they knew they were going to be hurt by it?". Our society is one that is afraid of conflict, afraid to tackle issues that are awkward to talk about, and afraid to jump in and help a stranger when you know they need it. As a result, our society is one that lives in fear of the threat. We protect against the result not the action. We throw up barriers in an attempt to hide from the threat, in an attempt to distance ourselves, but we know it never solves the issue.

Now I understand that there are some obvious flaws in the words I've typed, because obviously a majority of our society understands that all of the things I have mentioned are bad things to do and I also understand that there are campaigns in order to educate and discourage teens from Cyber Bullying, but if you have read this far and deemed me an idiot you have missed the point. Let me hit you with some statistics. 4,600 people ages 10-24 commit suicide every year in the United States. A study done in Great Britain estimates that half of those deaths are directly linked to bullying. Along with those 2,300 deaths each year, another 160,00 kids stay home from school every single day because they fear being bullied. That means that every 3 hours and 45 minutes a person between the age of 10 and 24 will commit suicide due to bullying and another 160,000 might be thinking about it.

Now you might be thinking that 2,300 deaths a year isn't a lot, almost 5 times more people die every year from drunk driving accidents, but even if there was just one 10 year old, just one, that committed suicide as a direct result of bullying, wouldn't that be too many? Imagine that is your 10 year old. Your little 4th grader that barely knows how to pack their own lunch is Cyber Bullied relentlessly enough that they decide they would rather be dead.

It's time to wake up. It's time to think about the sentences that you create and how they will affect those who will read them. It's time to stand up to bullies rather than stand on the sidelines. It's time to stop pretending like it isn't a big deal or that it is easily avoidable. Every person on this earth has the ability to take a stand and help a victim of Cyber Bullying, it is whether or not any one of those people has the courage to do so.